This afternoon I dug through tears to bury my beloved black lab dog. Wednesday while in the house, a visiting child stepped on him and he reacted by biting the child in the face. It wasn’t the dog’s fault. It wasn’t the child’s fault. It just was. It completely sucks. So many emotions going through me right now. It was all I could do to dig up the courage to do the right thing and put the dog down. I cannot risk a large dog like that around mine or anyone else’s children. While I love him very much and have run out of tears crying for him, I would ache a million times more if anything happened to mine or another child. In an ideal world I would have been able to find him a home on a farm with an older couple that knows exactly where he is coming from. He is getting older now and has less patience with children than he used to. A farm setting with some older folks to just sit on the porch and pet him while they all grow old together would be ideal. However, we do not live in an ideal world. And I cannot rewind time to prevent this whole accidental situation. There are no winners in this case. There is no silver lining. No brighter side, no better offs, no it’s gonna be ok. It just completely sucks to the bottom of my aching heart. I didn’t make it easier on myself by insisting to dig his grave. And to be there holding his paw when the vet came. However, that is what I would have wanted him to do if I had to be put down and he was the one making the tortuous decision.

That being said, shame on me. I know someone who just lost their mother and now found out they are fighting a deadly disease. There are soldiers dieing for our country. There are many who have ached and pained and cried and lost more than I have. But that doesn’t make me or anyone else feel better.

I love you my friend. I miss you. I’ll visit you often under the willow.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net